My bike story.

I've fallen behind on the Bold and True series, but better late than never!

I am very passionate about cycling as an alternative means of transportation. I never could ride my bike anywhere as a kid; we lived too far from anything and there were busy country roads surrounding our neighborhood. It never really occurred to me to consider cycling as a way to get around. Even when I started college and left my car behind I just walked places and it never once entered my mind to get a bike. In some of my college days in Austin I borrowed bikes and rode around by campus, which was super fun even in the heat of summer. It was freeing. But it didn't really stick in any way. It wasn't until I moved to Portland and had a cheap hybrid bike of my own that I started really noticing cycling infrastructure and using a bike as an alternative to my car.

I started playing games with myself when I first moved here to see how long I could go without driving my car. I would ride my bike where I could or walk or take the bus. It was the first time I lived someplace that gave weight to cycling as an option. Suddenly that busy street that bordered my neighborhood, that in any other city would have prevented me from riding somewhere, had a separate bike lane. Less than a mile away was a neighborhood shopping district with retail, restaurants, pet store and grocery market. My needs were all close. Not that much further by bike I could reach larger grocery stores, my bank, farmer's markets, gyms and just about anything else I could think of. Geographically Portland is pretty compact and housing prices don't vary that much from city center to suburb so it's easy to live within a few miles of downtown. Since I moved here five years ago I've never lived further than three miles from the city center.

I went for a while without a bike after that cheap hybrid. I moved to LA and bought a fancy car in the meantime. It was such a necessity there. As soon as I got back to Portland I wasn't sure why I had that nice car. Eventually someone had stumbled upon some bikes and I rode around a bit on the borrowed bike. I was hooked almost immediately. It also helped that this was just about the time gas prices were starting to skyrocket and get over $3 a gallon for the first time and pushing upwards of $4. I went out and bought myself an old Schwinn off of craigslist and starting riding my bike to work a few days a week and riding around town to save gas. I dropped 20 pounds in a summer when I went from car driver to bike rider. I'm sure it helped that my bike weighed 40 pounds on it's own. I also worked with a lot of people who rode as well. Suddenly it was the normal thing to go out after work with co-workers and you all rode to the pub together. If someone was driving it actually threw a little muck in the works.

After spending almost a year on my tank of a Schwinn I bought a shiny new bike. It opened up a whole new world of possibility. Suddenly those hills I avoided weren't that bad. It's amazing what more than five gears and an aluminum frame will do for you. I almost tried cyclocross, which some of my friends are in to. I chickened out at the last minute because I was afraid I was going to break my arm. Then, two months later I broke my arm. I was on my way to work heading through a lighted intersection with a bike lane (painted bright green for visibility no less) when someone coming the other direction went through the light without looking and hit me. As I was flying through the air I remember thinking, well, this is my day to get in an accident.

Accidents happen and when you are exposed against a metal box with a couple hundred horsepower the results are not always so pretty. I knew this would happen to me one day. With so many cars on the road it was only a matter of time before I was hit; it was just matter of the severity. My elbow essentially separated from the rest of my arm and I fractured my kneecap. No head injuries though - helmets FTW! I had to have surgery to fix my arm. Before I went in they told me it would be one pin to hold the elbow part of the bone in place. As I came to from surgery they said, "OK, so you have a plate and seven screws in your arm now.". Apparently once they got in there it was a teensy bit worse than they thought.

I eventually healed and got back to being active, although this is an ongoing struggle. There are things I still can't do without residual pain. I can make it through a yoga class just fine, but if I do too much on my knees I can feel it by the end of the day. I have some dull aching in my arm lately; I can only assume this is the meteorological 'benefit' to my accident that everyone keeps telling me about. When it rains I'll feel it in my bones now. I have a nasty scar. It turns my stomach a little when I catch it in the mirror. I can't put weight on the incision; the bursae is inflamed and tender. I don't know if that will ever go away. It is a reminder every day of what happened.

Which brings me to my point. I hate cars. I hate cars for so many reasons. Not only are they bad for the environment, expensive, a symbol of the greed-culture that we live in, but they are boxes that keep you enclosed and immune to a human experience. One of the reasons I love biking is that you are face to face with your fellow commuters. There is no window barrier blocking sound and sight. You are standing next to someone and often conversation develops. Sure, it's small talk. "Nice day, isn't it?", "I like your bike," etc. But it breaks down those barriers and suddenly the world becomes a much smaller and less scary place. In your car you become immune to that and for a lot of people suddenly that means they don't have to follow normal social guidelines. They can be assholes and almost kill you or cause you to be in an accident and it doesn't matter. They do things they would never do face to face to someone. I've done it before. Tailgating someone, slamming on your brakes because someone cut you off. Not until I got out of my car and onto my bike did I get free from that kind of disassociated anger. It's so much more real to me now.

I could list article after article of cyclists who have been hit by cars and left for dead on the side of the road. After my accident I really had to evaluate how much I loved and believed in cycling as a form of transportation. When it comes down to it, it's something I love to do, it's healthy, it's environmentally friendly, it's cost effective. The only downside to riding a bike is cars. And it's not even so much the cars, but the drivers of those cars who lose their connection with the world when they step into their metal boxes. It's my lack of faith in humanity that really scares me about riding a bike. When I thought it about it I realized that I can't stop something that means that much to me just because I don't believe in the goodness and responsibility of other people. I have to do what I think is right and what I love, even if it scares me most of the time.

Since my accident I have been incredibly jumpy and paranoid. I still have a hard time getting out there. But each time I do I feel a little bit better about it. Each time I get home unscathed I feel a small victory inside me. And each time I get to roll down the street with the wind in my hair and if I'm lucky a little sunshine on my face it makes it worth it.